Stigma

I've been spending a lot of time thinking about the word Stigma. When trauma happens theres an automatic stimga. A label. All of a sudden you are that person in the room that had something happen to them. You are no longer that person that you were, before the event. There is no way to get back to who you were and there is no way that people will look at you the same. At least that is how it feels. I can remember the first time I felt that. My dad had unexpectedly passed away when I was 11. I remember coming home to a room full of people and the second I walked in, I became that kid whose dad passed away. I'm not sure what came first, either they treated me differently because of that or I shut down which led to them treating me differently even more, which led to me being awkward around them. It created this vicious cycle, but all I know when I went back to school, I was that kid whose dad died. Then I became the party kid because I was trying to numb my feelings. I think I still saw myself as the kid who lost their dad. I felt like I wore it and everyone knew. I was trying to find myself post- dad's death, but there was no finding my way back to who I once was. The truth of situation was, I wanted to be who I was before he died, but there was no way back and then I became this self-fulfilling prophecy of a lost, at-risk kid. It has taken decades to get me to where I am now. Everything I do now is a mission to help others. I guess finding myself again was through connection and relationship with those who have also gone through trauma. Tina and I run a podcast, Real Talk with Tina and Ann. You can find it on Apple, Spotify or anywhere you listen to your podcasts. We are on a mission to help others. There is joy in the journey.